Often the children of brain injured parents grew up in an emotionally neglectful environment. This type of environment can cause us to believe that our thoughts, feelings, and desires are unimportant, which can lead us develop the pattern of discounting our experiences and our feelings. We can continue to find it difficult to let people in, and to worry about the other person’s perception of us.
HOW TO RECOVER:
1. Start noticing and tracking your feelings: Print out feelings charts and track them each day. This is not something you have to do perfectly but it’s is important that you begin to listen to and acknowledge your own experience.
2. Notice your needs and wants: What are the things you need physically to survive? What are some things you need emotionally? do you notice any patterns as to when they arise?
3. Self-Care/loving the self: Self-care is about learning to love and nurture a ourselves. Are there things you wished your parents had done for you? Let’s make time to do those things for ourselves a great way to get great at developing an attitude of self love is practicing metta/loving kindness meditation.
4. Accept love from others: It can be easier to stay isolated when that is what we are used to, but it is important that we learn to offer ourselves those things we weren’t able to access as children, so give yourself a break! and remember:
5. Keep yourself safe: set healthy boundaries and learn to effectively identify and ask for what it is you want and need. Take it as slowly as you need to, and stay safe.